296 - Spectre

Films covered in this episode:
Spectre
Allen: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Calvin: ✰ ✰ ½
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Overall score: 64%

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The boys are back with the penultimate James Bond movie (but for how long? Probably quite a while, honestly). It's finally time for Spectre (or SPECTRE?), in which Christoph Waltz amazes everyone with the shocking twist no one saw coming that he's playing Blofeld and James Bond finally finds love like he didn't already do that three movies ago. It's a real surprise of an episode where up is down, left is right and Calvin is the #1,000,000 James Bond fan on YouTube.

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295 - Valentine's Day Special: Sugar Babies: A Cautionary Tale

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Significantly upping the ante from last year's pornographic Valentine's Day special (which reviewed 1972's Deep Throat), this year the show is taking on a much more modern porn movie. Including Diminisodes and the intros for classic episode re-releases, Sol has told Allen about this movie in detail several times now. But does Sugar Babies: A Cautionary Tale live up to the hype?

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Films covered in this episode:
Sugar Babies: A Cautionary Tale
Allen: ✰ ✰
Calvin: ½
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Overall score: 40%

288 - Oscars 2023: Part II

in

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Boobedy-boo, the Diminishing Returns boys are back with the other half of this year's Best Picture nominees at the Academy Awards. Will the Oscar go to The Banshees of Inisherin, Top Gun: Maverick, Elvis, Women Talking, Everything Everywhere All at Once (or one of the films from last episode)?

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Films covered in this episode:
The Banshees of Inisherin
Allen: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Calvin: ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰
Overall score: 80%

Elvis
Allen: ✰ ✰ ✰
Calvin: ✰ ✰ ✰
Sol: ✰ ✰
Overall score: 54%

Everything Everywhere All at Once
Allen: ✰ ✰ ✰
Calvin: ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Overall score: 84%

Top Gun: Maverick
Allen: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Calvin: ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰
Sol: ✰ ✰ ½
Overall score: 67%

Women Talking
Allen: ✰ ✰ ½
Calvin: n/s
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰
Overall score: 55%

Marcel the Shell with Shoes On
Allen: n/s
Calvin: n/s
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Overall score: 70%

Guillermo Del Toro’s Pinocchio
Allen: n/s
Calvin: n/s
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰
Overall score: 80%

Puss in Boots: The Last Wish
Allen: n/s
Calvin: n/s
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Overall score: 90%

The Sea Beast
Allen: n/s
Calvin: n/s
Sol: ✰ ✰
Overall score: 40%

Turning Red
Allen: n/s
Calvin: ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Sol: ✰ ✰ ½
Overall score: 70%

287 - Oscars 2023

in

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It's the annual Diminishing Returns Oscars extravaganza -- and Calvin has seen a record number of this year's Best Picture nominees! Listen for the gang's thoughts on All Quiet on the Western Front, Avatar: The Way of Water, The Fabelmans, Tar, Triangle of Sadness and more!

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Films covered in this episode:
All Quiet on the Western Front (2022)
Allen: ✰ ✰ ½
Calvin: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰
Overall score: 67%

Avatar: The Way of Water
Allen: ✰ ✰ ½
Calvin: n/s
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Overall score: 60%

The Fabelmans
Allen: ✰ ✰ ½
Calvin: ✰ ✰ ½
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Overall score: 57%

Tar
Allen: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Calvin: ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰
Overall score: 80%

Triangle of Sadness
Allen: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Calvin: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Overall score: 70%

286 - Valentine's Day Special: Deep Throat

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We've finally done it. We've finally cut all pretenses and just covered an outright hardcore porn film for Valentine's Day. Hey, porn movies are still movies, guys.

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Films covered in this episode:
Deep Throat
Allen: ✰ ✰
Calvin: ✰ ✰
Sol: ½
Overall score: 30%

279 - Easter Special: God's Not Dead: A Light in Darkness (with Calvin Dyson)

in

Guest: Calvin Dyson

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To get everyone into the Easter spirit, we're celebrating by watching a Patreon-selected bit of religious propaganda. This time, we're going back to the God's Not Dead franchise for the third entry in the series.

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Films covered in this episode:
God’s Not Dead: A Light in Darkness
Allen: ✰ ✰ ½
Calvin: ½
Sol: ½
Overall score: 24%

276 - Diminishing Returns Are Dead (with Thomas Turgoose, Andrew Ellis and more)

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Guests: Thomas Turgoose, Andrew Ellis, Calvin Dyson, Judey Bignell, Conor Murray, Grace Miller, Emily Slade, How Didn’t This Get Made? and Nicky Diss

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A seance brings a number of never-heard-before clips back from the dead, featuring Thomas Turgoose, Andrew Ellis, Calvin Dyson, Judey Bignell, Conor Murray, Grace Miller, Emily Slade, Nicky Diss and Cubby R. Broccoli.

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275 - Valentine's Day Special: Showgirls (with Calvin Dyson)

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Sol is single again, so the sex anecdotes are plentiful. Oh, also, we talk about Showgirls because our Patreon supporters voted for it.

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Films covered in this episode:
Showgirls
Allen: ½
Calvin: ✰ ½
Sol: ✰ ✰
Overall score: 27%

274 - Review of the Year 2021: Part II (with Calvin Dyson)

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Seeing out the year in style – and only a month later than everyone else did. By the way, we've heard some of you like James Bond. Listen for our (and guest Calvin Dyson's) thoughts on No Time to Die, along with a whole load of other 2021 films.

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Films covered in this episode:
Space Jam: A New Legacy
Allen: ✰ ✰ ✰
Sol: ✰ ✰ ½
Overall score: 55%

Candyman (2021)
Allen: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Calvin: ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰
Overall score: 80%

The Matrix: Resurrections
Allen: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Overall score: 70%

The Kingsman
Allen: ✰ ✰ ✰
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Overall score: 65%

No Time to Die
Allen: ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰
Calvin: ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰
Sol: n/s
Overall score: 80%

273 - Review of the Year 2021 (with Calvin Dyson)

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It's 2022! Time to look back at 2021, right? Hear our thoughts on everything from A Quiet Place: Part II to Coming 2 America to Gozilla vs. Kong to Mortal Kombat to The Forever Purge... and more, obviously!

Check out our Patreon here!

Films covered in this episode:
A Quiet Place: Part II
Allen: ✰ ✰ ✰
Conor: ✰ ✰
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰
Overall score: 54%

Escape Room: Tournament of Champions
Allen: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Sol: ✰ ½
Overall score: 50%

Coming 2 America
Allen: ✰ ✰
Gareth: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰
Overall score: 57%

Godzilla vs. Kong
Allen: ✰ ✰
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰
Overall score: 50%

Mortal Kombat (2021)
Allen: ✰ ✰
Sol: ✰
Overall score: 30%

The Forever Purge
Allen: ✰ ½
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Overall score: 50%

271 - Kingsman: The Golden Circle (with Calvin Dyson)

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Guest: Calvin Dyson

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This episode was recorded over a year ago and has been sat on an exclusive Patreon shelf ever since thanks to The King's Man being delayed. Just like with the eventual release of our The Purge episode earlier this year, it's now a super-sexy time capsule from a more complicated time. Also: Calvin's back!

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Films covered in this episode:
Kingsman: The Golden Circle
Allen: ✰ ½
Calvin: ✰ ✰ ✰
Sol: ✰ ✰ ✰ ½
Overall score: 54%